A Different Kind of Worth
by hullosweetpea
Summary: It bothered Steve, even though he was able to budge it. In fact, that bothered him more. It takes a demigod from another realm to remind Steve of what he's always known: he is worthy.


**A/N: I went and saw Age of Ultron Saturday and it was amazing. Obviously this story has spoilers so read at your own risk from here on out. I couldn't let it rest that my favorite Avenger wasn't worthy enough to wield Mjölnir. He's freaking Captain America, but it did provide an excellent story idea. This takes place after then end of the movie.**

A Different Kind of Worth

Steve took his gear off and threw it on his bed with a sigh. He stepped into the shower, turning on the cold water and letting it blast out across his face and chest. His bruises and cuts were already starting to heal as droplets of water chased down his arms and legs. He picked up the bar of soap and began to lather up, scrubbing away the dirt, the dust, the guilt, the shame. He rested his head against the tiled wall and took a deep breath. It was completely childish. In fact he didn't even know why he was so hung up about it. It's not even like it mattered that much.

Nope.

Not at all.

Nada.

Who was he kidding?

Steve wanted to know why he couldn't lift Mjölnir.

He was a super solider, stronger than any man on Earth. He gave his body up for science, his life for his country and his happiness for the good of the planet. Was that not enough? Was he not worthy enough?

He watched as the soap suds swirled down the drain and remembered something from when he tried to lift the hammer. It budged, just a bit. The smallest amount of movement. Barely noticeable. In fact he probably wouldn't have even remembered it if he hadn't seen everyone's shocked faces, including Thor's.

That's what was bothering him. Not that he wasn't able to lift it, but Thor's face. Almost as if he expected Steve to be able to lift it and he was disappointed in him. Well, he was also still disappointed that he couldn't lift the hammer either. It hurt to be judged by an inanimate object.

Steve turned the water off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. He grabbed his razor and shaving cream from off the counter and slapped it on his face.

Was he not worthy because he didn't earn his strength?

Was he not worthy because he didn't save Bucky?

Was he not worthy because he left Peggy?

Was he not worthy because he didn't stop HYDRA?

Was he not worthy because he struggled to lead the team?

Was he not worthy because he didn't look for Bucky when he came out of the ice?

Was he not worthy because he let Bucky become the Winter Solider?

Was he not worthy because he kept Howard from having a relationship with Tony?"

Was he not worthy because he wished he could have grown old with Peggy as a scrawny man instead of saving the world?

Was he not worthy because some days he wished he wasn't Captain America and was just Captain Steve Rogers?

Steve felt a sharp sting on his jaw and he realized he cut himself with his razor. He mumbled a curse and grabbed a wad of toilet paper to wipe up the blood that had come out. By the time he had it wiped up the cut skin was already a raised, pink scar.

He ran his hand over his face, letting his fingers glide across the smooth skin, staring at his reflection in the mirror. He pulled on a pair of boxers and ran a towel through his hair, fluffing it up in some spots. He hung it back on the rack and stepped out of the bathroom. He threw his gear off his bed and over into a corner by the closer. He grabbed a white tee shirt from his dresser and pulled it over his head. Steve punched his pillow into fluffy submission before laying his head down.

-o-O-o-

 _His eyes fluttered open and he saw his reflection in a strange watery pool. He looked up at the sky and saw glittering stars that he knew he had never seen on Earth. He felt that someone was staring at him and he turned around. "Thor?"_

 __ _The blonde demigod nodded. "Yes, my good captain. Something must be bothering you for me to appear here."_

 __ _Steve held his head. "So, you're really here?"_

 __ _Thor shook his head. "It is a very rare thing to happen. In its very loose terms; it is a dream, but it is far more than that."_

 __ _"So Asgardian magic?"_

 __ _"If you wish to call it so, yes."_

 __ _Steve sat down by the water and Thor sat next to him. "What would call you down here from Asgard? Why me?"_

 __ _"Captain, you delude yourself. You already know the answer."_

 __ _Steve sighed. "Mjölnir."_

 __ _Thor nodded. "Yes, my friend. You are discouraged by your disability to lift it. You are ashamed."_

 __ _"Whosoever holds this hammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of Thor," recited Steve._

 __ _Thor looked down at Mjölnir and flipped the mighty hammer. "Yes, that is what it says. But not everything is as it appears. Even I at one time could not wield MjöInir."_

 __ _Steve gave a small smile and scoffed. "Yeah, Thor wasn't able to lift Thor's hammer."_

 __ _Thor shook his head. "It is true. I was unworthy and my own weapon renounced me as I had renounced my calling. I was no longer protecting the realm out of the goodness of my heart, but by the selfish nature to be the best. Until I learned this I was banished; it was not until I remembered what it was to care that I was once again deemed worthy to wield MjöInir."_

 __ _Steve looked back at his reflection. "I've given up so much. What's left for me to give?"_

 __ _Thor gave a hearty laugh. "My captain you have missed the point."_

 __ _Steve's eyebrows scrunched together. "What was the point?"_

 __ _"Under what circumstances were you trying to lift MjöInir?"_

 __ _"We were just trying to see if we could lift it," explained Steve. "How does that make a difference?"_

 __ _"You were trying to best each other. A competition. You were not trying to lift it to protect others, but to prove your superiority above others. That is not the purpose of MjöInir, so you were all pronounced-"_

 __ _"Unworthy," finished Steve. "So then why could I make it budge when the others couldn't?"_

 __ _"Because MjöInir could see the goodness in your heart. It knew that you had the potential to be worthy. You only needed to be in the right circumstances."_

 __ _"So I might be able to lift MjöInir?"_

 __ _Thor nodded. "You just might."_

 __ _Steve sighed. "Thor?"_

 __ _"Yes, my good captain."_

 __ _"Thank you."_

 __ _Thor clapped Steve on the back. "It is not I you should be thanking." He smiled and swung MjöInir up to the sky and left._

 __ _Steve closed his eyes feeling lighter._

-o-O-o-

Steve ran through the fight, punching enemies out with his shield, bouncing it around to take others out. He stopped a moment to take a breath and it was then that he was punched to the side. He slide across rubble and was buried part way into the dirt. He shook the daze off and stood up. He looked around for his shield and could not find it. Inside he found something else.

 _MjöInir._

When the Avengers had been called together again Steve hadn't even thought of the magical weapon or the dream in years. He knew now that if Thor didn't have it meant Thor could possibly be out of commission. It could mean they would lose. Without thinking about it Steve leaned over and grabbed MjöInir by the handle and lifted it up high. He raised it up before bringing it crashing down, sending waved across the battlefield and ringing strong. Steve looked down and realized he had brought the hammer down in his shield. He picked it up and strapped it back on and ran out on the field.

"You lucky son of a bitch," yelled Tony as he flew by in his suit.

Steve looked through the sweat and grime and grinned.

He was worthy. 


End file.
